Tuesday, September 26, 2006

A Few Health Questions and Answers




Just thought I'd throw in a quick post with some very helpful health Q&A I've come across. It just may change your life - I know it did for me :o)

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!...Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around themiddle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
Enjoy life, friends and loved ones - stay healthy :o)

4 comments:

Tuffysmom said...

Excellent Post...I agree completely. So, therefore, I must go now and take my nap..hehehehe.
Like your new purple colour.
Love you lots, Mommy xxxxx ooooo xxxxx

NanNan said...

Love the purple colour-- it's a keeper!!! That's my kind of health questionnaire--- funny---

NanNan said...

Don't know why I scrolled down to the bottom of your page, but I found that quote----- and it really speaks to me----- how did you find it?? thanks--- love you

mikki said...

NanNan, that quote is actually a small poem I had read years ago (high school, I think), and it just always stuck with me. It's called Separation - I think it struck a chord with me even then, because it seemed my whole life had been about one kind of separation or another. So, in a way, separation has helped make me who I am today, for better or worse.